Despair

I.

you.

Alone.

Together.

There was nothing

to say. Words failed

us. Hauuuuuuh.

Me in the chair.

You on the bed.

Life is not

fair is

what I wanted to say

not cough and

swallow.

You didn’t even 

look 

when the nurse said 

it's a beautiful day

outside.

Traffic-Jammed Intersections in the Brain

Traffic-jammed intersections in the mind. 

The cause: Again, multi-car crash. 

The cause: Again, Anger tailgating Fear, 

Surprise 

unconscious, half under and half behind 

Happy still asleep at the wheel, 

with Disgust 

ahead repelled by Sorrow and Sorrow

feeling the cracks in the pavement where shards

of glass encircle a dandelion, 

headless. 

A hollow voice from deep inside the stem: 

Could have avoided this. 

Could have avoided this.

Anger, My Love, Protector, Enemy

Anger, my love, protector, enemy:
Did you force yourself on me
or was it I who chose you
while blind drunk on my weakness,
wishing to replace my dread,
pain, guilt, shame, to stop feeling sad?
You, shielding me from the pain of abuse,
from malice, unpredictability,
neglect, incompetence, stupidity,
and universe's cool indifference.
When you take my hands to dance
the fire around your heart scorches my skin
and the ice at your center freezes mine.
How my heart burns! I sometimes
wonder if this is what love must feel like.